Lasting Damage Read online

  “Did you just throw me a Mary Poppins reference?” Harper couldn’t help but laugh.

  “I’ve had a few drinks.” Jane took another drag and exhaled. “And a few pills. Nothing I’m saying should be taken seriously.”

  “So, when is this party and what would you like me to wear?”

  “Friday night,” answered Jane. “And, for the record, you’re not allowed to be cute and flirt with me until after I grant you my forgiveness.”

  “I know you’re pissed.”

  “Don’t bother trying to state the obvious,” she said, staring down into her cup. “It’s a waste of time.”

  “What if I told you that I was an idiot?”

  “It’s a start.” Jane looked up; her eyes were cool and assessing. “But I’ll need a real explanation.”

  “I don’t know that I have one.” Harper confessed.

  Jane crossed her arms over her chest and narrowed her gaze.

  Harper opened her mouth and closed it again without saying anything. “I can’t figure out what I want to say,” she said, her voice shaking with anxiety.

  “If you don’t know what you want to say how can you expect me to help you?” Jane subbed the half smoked cigarette out and took another drink. “And when you don’t talk it forces me to make assumptions.”

  “I panicked. I knew who you were and I knew you kept as far away from industry people as possible.” Harper let the words form without thinking. “I didn’t want you to think I was hanging around for any other reason than liking you. I was wrong and I’m sorry.”

  “I find that to be an acceptable explanation.” She nodded thoughtfully. “Now, you show up here on Friday night looking slick and expensive and things will be better.”

  “You should’ve held out a few more minutes.” Harper teased. “I make a really good macaroni and cheese. I put bacon in it and make a white sauce with cheddar.”

  Jane cracked a smile. “Are you trying to beg my forgiveness with comfort food?”

  “Bacon and cheddar cheese.” Harper reminded her. “No one can resist it.”

  “Now you’re just being a kiss-ass.” Jane gave the cup a swirl before she downed the last of her drink. “Do you want to come in and I’ll make you a drink? I bought a huge bottle of Russian Standard that I’m never going be able to finish on my own.”

  “I can’t,” Harper felt an immediate sting of regret at having to turn down the invitation. She wanted to follow Jane into her house and watch her mix a drink but she was obligated to putting the album together. “I’ve got drive back to Riley’s. Things aren’t going very well.”

  “Bummer.” Jane’s eyes shifted away from Harper and settled on the parking spaces down below. She stood up and peered over the railing. “Getting people drunk is my specialty.”

  Harper turned to watch a black Lexus roll to a stop out in front of the building. She was about to ask who it was when both front doors opened and two women, a blonde and a brunette got out.

  Harper couldn’t take her eyes off them. They made her think of a beautifully mismatched set of salt and pepper shakers. The blonde was tiny, overly thin and disheveled in a put-together kind of way. The brunette looked expensive, stunningly beautiful, and cold. Harper realized it was the difference between new money and old money.

  “Alice and Lily.” Jane motioned with her head as the duo ambled up the walkway and headed toward the stairs. “The walking wounded.”

  “Is my sister plying you with alcohol?” The blonde’s eyes were big and bright and her smile seemed easy.

  “You must be Alice?” Harper asked. “I’ve heard a lot about you.”

  “I’m sure you have,” Alice laughed as she and Lily stepped up to the porch. “Jane and Riley love bitching about me.”

  “Not gonna argue with that.” Jane answered with a disinterested shrug. “Since Harper and Alice have already done introductions, Lily Hastings, this is Harper Merrick and Harper this is Lily. You can speak to her but do not shake her hand. Lily likes to bite people.”

  “Hmmm,” Lily sighed dramatically, her full red lips curling deliciously. “Human’s taste good.”

  “Oh, speaking of Riley,” Harper paused to take Alice’s phone out of her pocket and handed to her. “He said you needed this back.”

  “Sweet.” Alice pressed the power button and immediately started opening apps.

  “What is that?” Lily pointed to the cup in Jane’s hand. “Don’t tell me she talked you into buying her a keg?”

  “Do not let the Solo cup fool you.” Jane scowled at her friend. “I don’t do shitty fratboy beer.”

  Lily put her bag down next to Jane’s chair and picked up the pack of cigarettes. “Turkish Golds?”

  “She’s feeling nostalgic,” Alice announced, momentarily joining the conversation before going back to her phone.

  “So, what’s in the cup?” Lily scrunched her face into a funny scowl and gave it a curious sniff. “Am I going to hate it?”

  “Only if you’re an ungrateful asshole.” Jane announced.

  “When am I ever not an ungrateful asshole?” Lily’s batted her thick eyelashes at her friend and gave her a wicked smile. “It’s sort of what I do.”

  “Ungrateful assholery?” Jane laughed. “Man, you got that right.”

  Lily plucked a cigarette from Jane’s pack and produced a lighter from her purse with expert speed. “So, you two wanna go dancing? Maybe pick up some pretty girls and teach them how to do bad things?”

  “Harper needs to get back to Riley’s.” Jane answered.

  “What about you?” Lily smiled.

  “I’ve got a date with Chloe’s hair.”

  “That means Chloe’s out,” Alice snapped a quick picture of her shoes and started texting again.

  “That’s too bad,” Lily sighed. “It’s no fun going to a lesbian bar with a straight girl.”

  “Hey,” Alice laughed. “I am a very fun person.”

  “Yes, but you not one of the ‘lesbians who lunch’.” Lily informed her. “I’m going to spend the whole night explaining why you won’t go home with anyone.”

  Alice rolled her eyes before breaking away from their little crowd and stomping off into the apartment. Lily made an annoyed growling sound and followed a second later.

  “Lesbians who lunch?” Harper couldn’t help but ask.

  “Alice likes to dance with girls but she doesn’t eat pussy.” Jane hooked her thumbs into the belt loops of her cutoffs and grinned like a bad cat. “Lily likes to remind her of that every time they go out to a bar together.”

  “Because she likes her?”

  “Lily? No.” Jane chuckled. “They’re good playmates but Lily likes her girls a whole lot more pulled together than my sister is ever gonna be.”

  “I’d ask about you and Lily but I’m sort of floundering around with this misplaced sense of jealousy.”

  “Jealousy is an unavoidable part of human conditions.” Jane put a fresh cigarette to her lips and paused. “And, for the record, I don’t think you’re floundering. I know what other people see when they look at Lily, but when I look at her I just see family. It’s the same with Chloe.”

  “The waitress who grabbed me?” Harper asked.

  “Smart girl.” Jane tapped Harper’s forehead with her index finger and smiled. “You’ve put two and two together and come up with four.”

  “Doesn’t everyone?”

  “Not really,” Jane replied. “And you should probably get going before Riley calls to chew me out for distracting the talent.”

  “He did tell me not to stay too long. It was something about you stuffing Alice into the trunk of my car.” Harper pushed away from the railing and pulled out her car keys. As much as she wanted to stand on the porch basking in her general awesomeness she got the impression Jane wasn’t a fan of farewells that lingered on for hours. “What time would you like to see my face on Friday?”

  Jane brought the cigarette to her lips but pulled her hand away and said, “Seve
n sounds good.”

  “Okay,” she said as she stepped down on the first stair. “Seven it is.”

  *****

  Harper was at Riley’s kitchen table flipping through mock-ups of potential album when Alice wandered into the room with a bottle of orange juice in one hand, a pint of tequila in the other and her brother hot on her heels.

  “You need to go back to Jane’s,” he said juice bottle. “Alice?”

  “What?” She turned around, her mouth formed into a wide smirk.

  “You need to-”

  “Drink.” She interrupted with a high pitched laugh. “Riley, I need to drink.”

  Riley glared at the back of her head while she crossed the kitchen and plopped herself down across the table from Harper and smiled. “Hi.”

  “Hi,” Harper said with a friendly wave.

  “Please don’t encourage her.” Riley made his way to the sink and poured himself a glass of water. “And don’t make eye contact. Once you make eye contact we’ll never get her to leave.”

  “I don’t see why you’d want me to leave,” she mused as she unscrewed the cap on the tequila bottle. “I’m the better sister.”

  “Oh,” Riley laughed. “You are?”

  “The two of you are aware that our sister, Jane, is using Harper to get back at some bitches from high school?” Alice emptied the alcohol into her orange juice bottle, screwed the cap back on and gave it a shake. “She’s on a vengeance quest.”

  “A vengeance quest?” Riley looked from Alice to Harper before looking back to Alice. “You’re being overly dramatic.”

  “Some occasions call for overly dramatic behavior. It’s often the best way to get anyone in this family to pay attention to what I’m trying to say.” she stated.

  “Okay, fine,” Riley replied. “You’ve got our attention. What is it you want us to know.”

  “Not you. This message is for Harper,” she said, pointing to her brother before unscrewing the cap of her orange juice and took a slug.

  “Sounds ominous.” Harper sat back and, against everyone’s advice, gave Alice her full attention. She tried to tell herself that it was because Alice deserved the chance to be listened to but in her heart she knew it was probably just to find one more way to stay in Jane’s good graces.

  “It is and it isn’t,” she said with great care and measure.

  “Did you remember to take your Adderall?” Riley asked before taking the spiked bottle of juice away from her. “You didn’t skip doses again?”

  “My medication schedule has nothing to do with this.” Alice gave him a sour scowl. “This is about Jane.”

  “She already told me about the frenemies situation.”

  “And you’re okay with that?” She scoffed.

  “It’s a non-issue.” Harper shrugged. She hadn’t really spent a whole lot of time wondering if she was okay with it or not since that part didn’t matter to her. She knew Jane needed a date and she just happened to be standing in the right place at the right time. There was no way she was going to spend a whole lot of time overthinking something that didn’t need overthinking. This was her do-over, her chance to show Jane that she wasn’t a complete asshole and she was taking it.

  “How can it be a non-issue?” Alice crossed her arms over her chest.

  “It’s not any of your business.” Riley reminded her.

  “Yes,” she said, “but-”

  “No, you don’t get to do this.” Riley interrupted.

  “Yes, I do.” Alice closed her eyes and took a deep breath. “You guys need to listen to me.”

  Harper didn’t say anything. Her options at rebuttal seemed pretty limited since Alice appeared to be immune to logic.

  “Are you seriously willing to throw away all your dignity and self-respect on someone who will never think you’re good enough for you?” Alice asked. “She’s never going to forgive you for lying to her. She’s just stringing you along and using you to hurt other people. How can you sit there and be okay with it?”

  “I need to get back to the studio.” Harper pushed back from her chair and stood up. She was being as polite as she could but Alice put her teeth on edge. “I’ll see you in a few?” she asked Riley.

  “Sure.” he nodded. “Just let me get things under control out here.”

  Alice turned her head, her eyebrows knit into tight line. “You don’t need to talk about me like I’m a problem that needs to be fixed.”

  Riley opened his mouth to say something and quickly closed it before shaking his head. “Here’s your breakfast,” he muttered as he set the bottle of spiked juice down on the table next to her. “I don’t have time to deal with this.”

  It was easy to see why he and Jane kept passing their sister back and forth between them, neither one letting her settle in and get too comfortable before they had her moving back to the other’s place. It seemed like the only way they could manage to keep control of her was to keep her uprooted.

  “Should we just leave here there?” she asked when they were out of earshot. “Is she safe by herself?”

  Riley wrapped his hand around the door handle and gave it a turn. “She’s probably not safe anywhere,” he said with sad smile. “But it’s the best I’ve got right now.”

  9.

  “Is that what you wearing?” Alice pointed to the dress hanging on the back of Jane’s bedroom door and scrunched up her face. “I do not approve of this.”

  “How can you not approve of that dress?” Jane asked as she smoothed her hands along the sides of her head. It was one of those rare instances in life where every single strand was in place, her makeup was flawless and she smelled amazing,

  “It’s not just the dress.” Alice eyed her from top to bottom before letting out an exhausted sounding sigh. “I don’t approve of any of it.”

  “I guess it’s a good thing that I’m not looking for your approval.”

  “This whole thing is gross.” Alice sniffed before taking a swig from her bottle of Dr. Mcgillicuddy’s. “You’re gross.”

  “Oh, I’m the gross one?” Jane laughed as she opened her closet, took out her new shoes and placed them on the edge of the bed.

  “Zanotti?” Alice pulled the cover off the box to reveal the four and a half inch black strappy sandals nestled inside. “Since when do you go to Neiman’s with Chloe?”

  “Since I wanted a new pair of shoes.” Jane replied.

  “You sure this is a good idea?” she asked, pointing to the shoes. “You and Harper are the same height. You put those on and suddenly you’re a giant with a short girlfriend.”

  “Harper’s not my girlfriend.” She took the shoes out of the box and set them on her dressing table. In the last hour Alice had consumed half a pizza, four donuts and half a pint of booze, she wasn’t about to take the risk of getting her sister’s greasy little finger prints all over her shiny new babies.

  “My psychiatrist says you have a narcissistic personality disorder.” Alice announced. “It’s probably why you’re having such a difficult time letting go of Robin.”

  “Excuse me?”

  Alice took another swig, set the bottle down on the nightstand and let out a deep, mournful sigh of what had to be fake sisterly despair. “The fact that you’re putting in so much effort into making some bitches from high school jealous is very sad.”

  “Is this the same doctor that’s got you on six different medications at the same time?”

  “That’s not the point.” Alice sat up and shook her head with such authority she looked like she actually believed the weirdness spewing out of her mouth.

  “I don’t care what he says about me,” she replied before crossing the room to get her dress. “The guy is a hack.”

  “He said you’d get defensive when I confronted you with the truth.” Alice held her hand up in mock defeat as she slid off the bed. “Don’t shoot the messenger.”

  “Can't you please go back to Riley's for a few days?” Jane settled the dress on the bed and unzipped it. She
was slightly ahead of schedule but things could steer off track quick if Alice wanted to keep talking at her. “I’ve only got one nerve left and you’re starting to wear it thin.”

  “Classic deflection technique,” Alice mused. “Insult and belittle. Your hostility toward people is a direct result-”

  “Stop it, Alice.” She interrupted before her sister could go any further. “You cannot continue to do this.”

  “Okay.” Alice shrugged and took another drink. “How much did you spend on the bra and panties? They look expensive”

  Jane placed a hand on her stomach and took a breath. She got the distinct feeling that all of Alice’s mindfuckery was guiding her toward a specific outcome. Some sort of twisted endgame that only made sense inside the depths of Alice’s tiny lizard brain.

  “Do you think Robin will say anything about you not being blond anymore?” Alice asked as she inched toward the door.

  “I hadn’t thought about it.” Jane could feel the tendrils of panic closing in on her. It was a hot, miserable feeling that would be impossible to shake if she didn’t get control of it soon.

  “Hey, speaking of blond,” Alice snickered. “Does Harper have an issue with the carpet not matching the drapes?”

  “What are you doing, Alice?” she asked.

  Alice took another sip and smiled. “What do you think I’m doing, Jane?”

  “I think you’re trying to fuck with my head.”

  “Trying? Alice leaned against the wall and closed her eyes for a brief second. “If you only think I’m trying then I’m not doing a good enough job.”

  Jane took a step closer. She and Alice hadn’t had a good fight in a while and she disliked any kind of confrontation when she was only wearing her bra and panties but Alice had pushed her just about as far as she was capable of being pushed in one day

  “Hey, Harper’s here.” Lily popped her head into the doorway before Jane could reached her sister. “Don’t you think you should be getting dressed?”